The University Network

Are We Love Obsessed? A Guide to Focusing On Yourself First

So here’s the thing about dating in college: it’s a rollercoaster of emotions that can be a great experience for some and a horrible one for others. Some of us jump into relationships too quickly while others long for that special someone in their lives. The one thing college students tend to focus on are relationships, or just being with someone in general (not to forget the focus on the popular hookup culture; but that’s another article).

This isn’t a new thing; our generation grew up with Disney movies telling us about how great it is to find prince charming.  I’m not saying that that is the main reason we want love or relationships so badly but imagine if we grew up with movies about finding ourselves and our purpose in life instead of finding love. Nonetheless, we have to stop focusing so much on finding love and/or getting into relationships but focus more on ourselves. It might sound selfish but this is the time to be selfish in the best way. We have got to start bettering ourselves and stop being so hung up on the fact that we haven’t found “the one” yet. In all honesty, honing in on your skills and becoming a better you are more important, and eventually, you’ll really know what you want in a significant other when the opportunity presents itself. So instead of worrying that you’ll be the last single person in your friend group, focus on some of your goals. Here are some productive things you can do with your time while you are single:

Treat Yourself

College can be stressful. When you have the time, do something nice for yourself! Go out and get a manicure or take yourself to that movie you’ve been dying to see. You don’t have to wait until someone else’s schedule clears up to have a great day. When life gets too hectic or you feel like you’ve been working too much, it’s a good thing to just have some alone time and relax. School, work, and social life are all important, but finding the time to just relax by yourself is key to balancing it all. 

Read More Books

It can be hard to read books you actually want to read while in school, but it can bring solace. Don’t just read any book though. Read books about people who made their dreams come true or people who are doing what they love. One suggestion is Mindy Kaling’s book Why Not Me? It’s essentially about her journey of finding fun and excitement in her adult life; it’s full of laughs and lessons. So when you find the time, pick up a good book.

Get Fit

Everyone’s body is different and beautiful, so incorporating healthy habits can be done in different ways. Being healthy and starting healthy habits right now is essential. It can be as simple as incorporating more fruits and vegetables into your diet or drinking more water daily. Either way, the goal is to stop fueling ourselves with so much junk and to get a little more active. Eating better and incorporating some sort of exercise is a great way to get more energy and feel great.

Find an Internship

The things you learn in college are great but applying them to real life is even better. Finding an internship is a must if you want a career in your chosen field. Proving to yourself that you can do the work you’re studying for is a big confidence booster and it will contribute to a positive perspective. Whether it be technology or journalism, finding an internship in your chosen field is a great way to get your feet wet and discover if you really like what you’re studying. With an internship you’ll get to put what you already know to the test.

Step Out of Your Comfort Zone & Try Something New

You can try out a salsa class or train for a marathon! Whatever it is just, go out of your way to have new experiences and make lasting memories with the people you care about most. College is going to go by quickly. Make some unforgettable memories so that when you look back on your college days, you can remember how much fun you had instead of remembering how much time you wasted focusing on why you were single.